Friday, February 6, 2009

Too Many Helping Hands

Phew! Finally I had successfully and safely gave birth to my little princess, Cayenne. Though the time in hospital was very scary but I feel relieved once I was allow to go home on the 6th day.

My loving sister offers me her place for confinement she even had prepared the room for me and my baby. Although I prefer to stay at mom's place but due to her kindness and offering I did not turn her down, so I moved in immediately after discharged from the hospital.

The first night was very exciting for all of them, sis and niece wanted to sleep with me and baby, but it was very exhausted for me. After having long hours and sleepless nights at the hospital I wish I could have a peace sleep at that moment but I could not reject them to share the room. Somehow I failed to lie down and snore straight away as my pain from the C-Section is over powering me. Cries alot!

Feelings got worst when sis wanted to move my baby over to her room when she claims that I would have sleep better without the baby beside me. Why can't she understand being a new mother, I wanted to be close with my baby. I don't deny my sis is trying to help me but somehow her procedures in taking care of my baby are not the way I prefer. Am I too stubborn or too fussy here? But it is just me!

Nightmare begun when mom has to return to work after CNY break on the 6th days which is also my 2nd day of total-sleep (all the while I sat on a long chair to sleep), sis threw everything back to me. She wanted me to learn on how to take care of my baby all by myself that night but doesn't she understand that I do need another night or two to recover before I could be independent again?

Wanted to speak to somebody but they all thought that I am crazy even the Indonesian maid made crazy stories about me. I cried again! Anyhow, my sister's behaviour is worrying me when the pacifier she stuffed into my baby's mouth is against Calvin's order. Then I knew she increased the milk volume for my baby in a sudden. Now my baby does not eat at a fix volume, she sometimes need 3.5oz and sometimes only 1.5oz is more than enough for her. Night times are the worst time to feed her as she doesn't demand on a fix volume. Spoken to mom, she blamed me that I am too pamper of my baby and I shall not rock her when she cries... haiz! Now I wanted to cry... again? Yeah! I cried for few nights at sis' place then I decided to move to mom's place and turn over a new leaf of motherhood.

Though now feeding baby at nights is a tough job but I wish I could monitor it and maintain her feed demand with a fix volume and fix time. That is why sometimes too many helping hands do not really mean a good thing.

My comment to others, plan it out the help you need during your confinement. A good helping hand is more than enough than thousands of inconsistent mindset.