Little Mind Teaches Big Lessons

They Don't Call It The Terrible Twos For Nothing

2011-09-27T12:31:00.001+08:00

I remember very well, people once told me everything happened with a reason and guess this is not with exceptional too.

As Cayenne is turning 30mos, my patience level has to be increased to the max otherwise I think I could have done something which I will regret later. Is she trying to drive me nuts? The truth is, it is no fun for me but it is a normal reaction for a child at this age to starts showing her tantrum. Dealing with a defiant 2yo is a notoriously difficult part of childrearing.

I was so glad that I got the chance to meet with this lady doctor who works in a clinic in my mom's neighborhood. I had heard about her, a child specialist or child psychologist whom understand children better than any GP. Brought Cayenne to that clinic because of flu and bad coughing, and then at the same time asked her about child tantrum. I told her that Cayenne has a very bad temper and she starts shouting and screaming these days. I hate that she behaves like this and trying to seek for some advice from this lady doctor to educate my little princess because I do feel embarrassing when people comment about my child's manners.

The lady doctor only says:
- every child is different / unique, do not compare her with other kids
- even the most successful method might not works on her
- you must try to understand her, then
- speak / explain to her in her way (in children mode)
- there is nothing wrong in her, she has her own personality
- try to think it in this way that your child is special that is why she is different from other kids, she has her own thinking and she speaks / is expressing her idea or opinion to you

Her last words which really touches my heart and made my tears fall "A child with this attitude will be more successful than those who didn't fight back, very likely they will be the boss and not an employee". ;)

God bless my child and may God gives me the strength to hold on until I could see my child succeed in her life.

(More reading about terribe twos: http://www.babycenter.com/6_your-2-year-old-big-emotions_5934.bc)

When Another Kids Are Bad-Talking About Your Kid

2011-06-07T11:35:00.000+08:00

I read a story about a lady whom her son (5yo) is being bullied by two older kids (7yo). They are putting words into his mouth and bad-talk him at the playground so that other kids would not befriended him. This lady is seeking opinion whether she was doing right by pulling her son away and saying loud (so the two kids hear it) that his son does not need friends like this. What say you?

Personally I would like to hear from my child's decision on how he would like to do with this but in this case it is a bit hard to let a 5yo gets the best solution by himself. If I were his mom, I would encourage him to invite the other kids to our house to have playtime or tea parties. For I believe these could create space and time to proof to others how good or bad my son is. Sooner or later the other kids will know whether that two kids been telling truth or lies and eventually this will build better friendship among these kids and my son.

At the same time I would comfort my son from his worries of losing his friends and explain to him not to worry so much of what people badmouthing him for no one can defeats the truth. In addition, I would let my son to organize his parties, i.e. food & beverages, activities, type of games to be played and who to invite (and why not inviting so and so?).

I would be glad if you could add on the list on what could I do to help him better. Thanks!

Fun Day: How to Make a Scarecrow

2011-04-22T15:11:00.001+08:00

Thing you can make when you have free time with your children in decorating your garden.

(Thanks to eHow.com, http://www.ehow.com/how_3981_make-scarecrow.html#ixzz1KETQCeaM)

Materials:
* Buttons (optional)
* Straw Hat (optional)
* Gardening Gloves
* Glues
* Old Pillowcase
* Yarns, Straws, Dry Leaves or Rags (stuffing material)
* Felt-tip Pens
* Rubber Bands
* 10-foot long bamboo pole or something looks like it
* Ropes
* Old Belt (optional)
* Craft Wire, Floral Wire, Twine or Raffia (for tying)
* Old Shirt (not tees)
* Old Trousers or Overall

Steps:
1) Cut bamboo pole into two pieces, 4 feet long and the other 6 feet long.

2) Place the 4-foot section across the 6-foot piece, 1 foot down from the top.

3) Wire the two pieces together with floral wire, twine or raffia.

4) Place an old shirt on the short cross-piece of the frame and button the shirt in front.

5) Stuff the shirt loosely with straw, dry leaves or rags.

6) Place gloves at the end of the "arms" and secure them with rubber bands.

7) Pull one leg of a pair of trousers onto the long bamboo pole. The other leg will hang freely.

8) Tuck the stuffed shirt into the waist of the trousers.

9) Secure the waist of the trousers to the pole with a rope or belt, tying the belt or rope to the cross-piece if necessary to keep the pants from falling down.

10) Stuff the pants with the stuffing material of your choice.

11) Make a head for your scarecrow by stuffing straw into a pillowcase. Tie the pillowcase opening onto the top of the long stake with rope.

12) Draw a face with felt-tip pens, or glue on buttons for eyes and yarn for a mouth.

13) Stick the scarecrow in the ground or tie it securely in another location.

14) Put on a straw hat to make it look nicer.

Tips:
a) Be creative! Scarecrows can be male or female.

b) Dress up your scarecrow according to the occasion, perhaps in a tuxedo for a formal affair, or a cocktail dress if you're hosting a casual evening with friends.

c) If you decide not to make a scarecrow head, simply place a hat on the top of the long pole, stapling it to the bamboo so it stays in place.

d) Another way to avoid the pants falling off is to use overalls and secure them over the cross-piece.

e) Don't expect your scarecrow to scare off crows. They usually aren't afraid of such things.

Tell Me Why?

2011-04-20T16:11:00.001+08:00

Got a DVD series suitable for children aged 3-12,十万个为什么？, from aPee. Will try to compile as many questions as possible not a million. And hopefully these could help you in replying your young ones.

Stay tuned for more ;)

1) Why thunder comes after lightning?
- Light moves faster than sound.

2) Why do people yawn?
- Human need to inhale oxygen and exhale carbon dioxide to survive. When we are tired, more carbon dioxide is produced. If it doesn't get expelled fast enough, it will cause harm to the body.

Yawning is like deep breathing, it helps us inhale more oxygen and get rid of the harmful carbon dioxide. That's why yawning, in a way, protects our health.

3) Why do people have dreams?
- Our brain is made up of lots of nerve cells. These cells are very important as they deal with our sight, hearing, thinking, movement and so on. They work very hard during the day. At night, when we sleep, our brain will start to relax but not all the brain cells will stop working at the same time. It is those cells that are still active that cause us have dreams.

What we see or hear or expecting in the day may appear in our dreams.

4) Why do we have earthquakes?
- Most earthquakes are caused by the movement of the earth's crust. When this happens, the rocks on the earth's surface start to move. As the pressure becomes greater, some of the rocks will crack or collapse. This is known as an earthquake.

The force it creates is very similar to a volcano which is erupting. The collapse of the layer of line just under the ground will also cause tremors. The tremors will then spread from the center of the quake to the area around it. The tremors is greater as it is closer to the center and become weaker as it moves further away from the center.

Actually there are slight tremors happen every 2 minutes or so, but we normally don't feel it. As for strong earthquakes, they happen about 20 times every year.

How Does Your Little Sweetheart Tells You That He/She Loves You?

2010-12-30T09:59:00.000+08:00

I read this from babycenter.com this morning and tears become visible in my eyes. Never had I thought that our little ones, as young as a newborn, does know how to express their love to us *silly*.

Here are what been read from that article:
1) Your newborn stares into your eyes
He's actually working hard to memorize your face. He doesn't understand anything else about the world, but he knows you're important.

2) Your baby thinks about you even when you're not around.
Between 8 and 12 months old, he'll start to scrunch his face and look around when you leave the room — and he'll smile when you return.

3) Your toddler throws wicked tantrums.
Nope, those screaming fits don't mean he's stopped loving you. He wouldn't be so hurt and angry if he didn't trust you so deeply.

4) Your toddler runs to you for comfort when he falls down or feels sad.
Kids this age may not truly understand the meaning of "I love you," but their actions speak louder than words.

5) Your preschooler gives you a flower picked from the garden, a finger-painted heart, a sparkly rock, or another gift.

6) Your preschooler wants your approval.
He'll start to be more cooperative around the house, and he'll look for chances to impress. "Look at me!" will become a catchphrase.

7) Your grade-schooler trusts you with secrets, like his first crush or his most embarrassing moment.
You're his confidante, even if he shies away from your hugs in public.

Para Cayenne Con Amor

2010-12-09T15:26:00.001+08:00

When I was just a little girl
I never thought of what should I be
Will I be pretty, will I be rich?
What are all these to me?

When I grew up then fall in love
I thought who should my sweetheart shall be
And shall he be handsome, shall be rich?
Do these matter to me?

Now I grow old and have a little girl
I'm really worry'n how she should be
Shall she be pretty, shall she be rich?
I pray the best to be

Qué será será, whatever will be will be
The future must be good to she
Qué será será, what will be must be
The very best for she

Menu 1: Fruity Salad Porridge (Instant)

2010-11-23T17:10:00.000+08:00

Here is one of the baby's menu that I liked. It is for infant of 6+ months old.

Serves portion: 2 persons
Cooking duration: 20 minutes
Utensils: Usual Kitchen Utensils

Ingredients:
150 ml warm water
50 gm Nestlé® GOLD® Infant Cereal Rice with Apple and Cranberry
50 gm pureed pear
50 ml orange juice

Cooking Instructions:
1. In a bowl, mix all ingredients.
2. Mix well and serve immediately.

Nutrition count per serving:
Energy = 108 Kcal
Carbohydrates = 20g
Protein = 3.2g
Fat = 1.8g

Good To Know:
Cranberry may not be widely available locally but worth adding to a child’s diet.

Good To Remember:
Cranberry helps to fight infections with its anti-fungal and anti-viral properties.

Source: http://www.weaning.com.my/my/child_nutrition/recipes/recipe_detail.htm?stage=1&num=10&pci=5

Potty Training with 21mos Cayenne

2010-11-04T13:34:00.002+08:00

Have been thinking of potty train Cayenne so that she has lesser chance to get diaper rashes especially during hot spell. Read few forums about potty training toddlers so I decided to train her (no diaper) on a non-working Saturday. From that forum, it says bring your child to pee in every 20 to 30 minutes, so the first round I decided to wait for 30mins but failed (she pee in about 20mins). So the second round I decided to let her pee in another 20mins and it was successful. Then I concluded to bring her to the potty in every 20 minutes. Who knows?

She got frustrated and annoyed by my repeated question (you want to shee shee?) in every 20mins and brought her to sit on the potty, ended she remained silent and did not want to talk much. At the very last attempt, she told me "no shee shee, mi mi ngoi ngoi" (meaning she does not want to pee but want to sleep) *pity her* Then the whole evening (till nite time) she was very cranky.

This is the first time she asked for afternoon nap. I guess she was really fed-up with those attempts and decided to sleep. She even gave up watching Barney which is her favorite cartoon. So I put up a diaper on her and tell her to go to sleep with it. She smiles back at me and hug her pillow.

Today, I read from aNon's blog about Rachel's outing without big bag nor diaper on her. I count again and realized it happens when Rachel is 2yrs & 4mths old. So I guess I can wait a little longer in training her again. Hopefully, she is not phobia by her first potty training.

Wishing good luck to myself!

The Pampered Child Syndrome

2010-07-07T13:37:00.003+08:00

Parents often pamper their children without realizing it. They fail to realize that they are causing much damage to them such as personalty / behavior problems. Somehow I would try to brief a little about it here.

Children (you may see them in classrooms, offices, homes or public areas):
- who are given everything, but constantly demand more;
- who believe that they are entitled to the same rights as adults, but are not ready to accept grown-up responsibilities;
- who are loved, nurtured and protected, yet are unhappy, anxious or angry; and
- who are increasingly being diagnosed with emotional, behavioral or other major psychiatric disorders.

It is a multi-faceted sociological and psychological phenomenon, driven and supported by parents who truly believe they have their children's best interests at heart, and who work hard to ensure that their youngsters are given everything possible to make them feel special.

Please do not treat this child as if they are having measles, depressed, or defiant as this will not helping at all in improving their behavior.

Here is another list of identifying and dealing with them:
- a child may not be willing to accept refusal. He/She may cry or throw a tantrum, if what is desired is not received
- a pampered child may not listen to parents (parents may compromise on authority and the child takes the parents for granted)
- even in other relationships, the pampered child has adjustment problems. Among friends, the child may expect things to go on his/her favor
- the child may hold the parents responsible for her pampered behavior and dislike them for that
- he/she feels that parents can provide anything on this earth and may make demands that parents cannot meet
- parents do not rebuke a pampered child and this can spoil the child. The child may not realize his/her limits
- parents themselves find it difficult to meet demands, although, they try to do so
- he/she may find it difficult to accept setbacks and failures, the child may find it difficult to adjust to other environments which may not be as comfortable as the parental home.

There is a book entitled "How to Recognize it, How to Manage It, and How to Avoid It" by Dr. Maggie Marmen.

15999 15999 15999... Children Rights

2010-07-07T09:59:00.007+08:00

Remember the above number, 15999, for you may save young lives in Malaysia by just dialing that number. Please! Please! I am begging you please do report to them if you ever come across of any child being abused (physically or emotionally), threatened, tortured, sexually harassed, neglected, abandoned, used for begging, or trafficked.

Have a heart, show your sympathy, shower them with your love although they are nobody related to you. IT WOULD BE TOO LATE FOR YOU TO SHED A TEAR LATER when you read the news about a child was dead from being abused.

Read on to know more about the Malaysia Child Act 2001 [Act 611]:

(Act 611 repealed the Juvenile Courts Act 1947 [Act 90], the Women and Girls Protection Act 1973 [Act 106] and the Child Protection Act 1991 [Act 468].)

Source: Law of Malaysia

Lastly, have you heard about the smoking toddler in Indonesia? This one of the worst child abused stories that I had ever heard. It is about a child, two-year-old Ardi / Aldi, whom his father gave him his first cigarette at 18mos. I wish I could ask the mother / father to save their crocodile's tear in seeking help now.

Happy Mother's Day 2010

2010-07-01T13:40:00.002+08:00

This is my Mother’s Day 2010 write-up:

Many chapters have gone

My precious one is growing up fast and is catching up

Living with more excitements and worries

If there is only one wish for me before I die, it should be…

Another new and improved chapter begins

My little one turns to be a nice lady on earth

She will be smarter and wiser than me

She will be able to earn more and live well than me

Along with a sympathetic heart

She is stronger to help the poor

She is wealthier to donate to others

For I am no longer be around with her

I ask from God for a golden mask

To cover her tearful face and cast only smiles

And a steel cocoon for her

To protect her from bad and the most scary ones

Fearful less and fewer sad paths ahead

Nice spirits are always by her sides

To guide and hold her all along the way

To sing her a song to soothe her pains

Do remember these lines on every mother’s day

To reach me is not that far away

Just close your eyes and say my name

And I will be there

[I have been thinking what to write for this year Mother’s Day. Those I wanted to tell my momma are all expressed in last year post out and the only thing to continue doing is continuously shower her with my loves.

Yet I did not give up on writing a post for this year Mother’s Day, so struggling until today and that is why I am posting it out late this year (Mother’s Day 2010 blog posted on 30Jun2010 *LOL*).]

From Teething to Brushing Teeth

2010-06-30T15:15:00.003+08:00

Cayenne is turning to 18mos soon. There were so much worries and sleepless nights when she is teething especially when she had lost appetite at her first teething at 4mos. Seeing her only drinks up 2oz of formula for the whole day back then is really sickening... I broke down and cried few times.

I feel so bad each time after I scolded, bitten and/or whacked her when she refuse to drink. Tears fallen down on my face when I am recalling all these. Hate myself so much for being like this but I swear I will never ever repeat this.

Now, I think I am used to it, not so much worrying when she is teething and refuse to drink milk. As I can just feed her solid foods, on the other hands, somehow I realized she loves solid foods than milk. That is why I am looking for food enriched with Calcium (thanks to aPee and aNon for the info), I found Fernleaf CalciYum is not bad... she just love it (so far only tasted on Vanilla, Strawberry and Grape). Will try Yoplait later but it is kinda hard to get in local supermarkets.

Next, I have another thing to worry, now, toothpaste. So worry to buy her just any kid's toothpaste but very appreciate Kah Lai's reply. I have more confidence now in buying toothpaste from the pharmacy for her now. Just look for less fluoride for her age now although it is known to be good for tooth.

Let's go 洗刷刷 wooo wooo!

Child's Nap

2010-05-24T17:12:00.002+08:00

The average child's need to nap and on a napping schedule:

1) Newborns sleep as much and as long as they need to.
2) 4 and 12 months, babies move to two naps a day, one in the morning and one in the afternoon, each ranging from 20 minutes to three hours.
3) 2yo, most toddlers take a single two-hour nap in the middle of the day.
4) 3yo, some will have given up naps entirely.

As with most other sleep issues, consistency is essential.

Some says, by 15mos some children start to give up their morning nap. If you can, have your child nap in the same place that he sleeps at night. A set nap time in a set place will ensure that he gets the sleep he needs. The best times for naps are mid- to late morning for morning naps and early afternoon for afternoon naps. Don't let your child nap past 4 in the afternoon, or he'll have problems going to sleep at night. At least three hours should elapse between the end of an afternoon nap and bedtime. Make nap times consistent

And Other says, two naps are no longer predictable, although putting your child down for a short time in the morning and again in the afternoon is recommended. By the time he's 18 months old, don't expect more than one nap per day, usually between noon and 2 p.m. Don't let your child sleep past 3, or you may have a harder time getting him to bed at night.

Anyway, I think no forcing them to sleep as it should be an enjoyable task to do.

Vitamins, Minerals and Other Nutrients They Need

2010-05-24T17:10:00.001+08:00

Calcium: Builds strong bones and teeth, promotes healthy nerve and muscle function, helps blood clot, and helps the body convert food into energy.

Essential fatty acids (EFAs): Help build cells, regulate the nervous system, strengthen the cardiovascular system, build immunity, and help the body absorb nutrients. Necessary for healthy brain function and vision.

Iron: Important for making hemoglobin, the oxygen-carrying red pigment in blood, and myoglobin, a pigment that stores oxygen in muscles. Lack of iron can cause anemia, which can result in fatigue, weakness, and irritability.

Magnesium: Keeps bones strong and the heart rhythm steady, supports the immune system, and helps maintain muscle and nerve function.

Potassium: Works with sodium to control the body's water balance, which helps maintain blood pressure. Assists with muscle function and heart rhythm and, in later years, may reduce the risk of kidney stones and osteoporosis.

Vitamin A: Plays an important role in vision and bone growth; helps protect the body from infections; promotes the health and growth of cells and tissues in the body, including the hair, nails, and skin.

Vitamin C: Helps form and repair red blood cells, bones, and tissues; helps keep your child's gums healthy and strengthens blood vessels, minimizing bruising; assists with healing, boosts the immune system, and keeps infections at bay. Also helps the body absorb iron from iron-rich foods.

Vitamin D: Helps the body absorb minerals like calcium and builds strong teeth and bones. Essential for reaching growth potential and peak bone mass. Also functions as a hormone with roles in immune system health, insulin production, and regulation of cell growth.

Vitamin E: Limits the production of free radicals, which can damage cells. Important for immunity, DNA repair, and other metabolic processes.

Zinc: Needed by more than 70 enzymes that aid digestion and metabolism, and essential for growth.

Babyhood

2010-04-20T13:45:00.008+08:00

From the book I read, entitled How to Manage You Children printed by Federal Publication.

Everything a child sees and hears during the first five vital years is stored. So it's important to ensure that what goes into a child's impressions storage are things which do not upset him/her psychologically or emotionally and should be handled carefully.

A baby is a mass of instincts. If any one of a baby's instincts is thwarted, there is going to be a lot of noise. Try to find out the reason for the thwarted instinct of a baby and try to satisfy that. However, very often we do not know what is the actual problem (their instinct is about), so the best way to deal with it is to replace it by another instinct.

Remember! A BABY CANNOT THINK. It's just a bundle of basic instinct. Each instinctive activity is accompanied by a definite response which, if thwarted, causes irritation and results in crying.

Instincts such as hunger, curiosity, boredom, fear, cold, heat, light or darkness are common.

For example, if you baby starts crying / screaming and you totally out of idea what is so wrong with him (after checking the diapers, feeding milk / water, sleepiness), try behave crazily by making funny faces to him/her to arouse its curiosity (which is another instinct).

Diarrhea Baby

2009-10-26T14:36:00.000+08:00

My poor little Cayenne had been suffering from diarrhea for the past 10 days. Brought her to 2 paeds but they just can't stop the diarrhea as it is the only way to let the toxic out from her body.

Paeds are not much worry about her frequent poo-poo but dehydration. I was advised by doctors to feed her more plain non-dairy food and liquid. Doctor gave her ORS and Smecta (prebiotics) to maintain her fluid and guts strength.

So during that days I feed her:
- Rice (as plain porridge with little bit of Marmite for taste)
- Lactose Free milk
- Teething biscuits
- ORS diluted with water
- 100Plus diluted with water (this she takes very little as she's not liking its taste)
- Glucolin diluted with water (for energy)

and at the same time I have also was her bum-bum with soap and water and then apply Drapolene and alternatively with 'look-yup-fun' (a white powder you may get it from chinese pharmacy). I had also tried that Earth Mama's Angel Baby bottom balm but failed as it is very oily and maybe it does not compatible with Cayenne's skin. Gotta take extra care of her bum-bum too as rashes could be worst.

Extra notes for what to feed to diarrhea baby is banana, applesauce (whole boiled / steamed then mashed apple) and toast... it is theoretically proven.

Cheers.

How to Avoid Catching the H1N1 Virus

2009-07-29T14:27:00.002+08:00

(especially you are with young kids)

1) Wash your hands. The best thing you can do is wash your hands with warm, soapy water. In you mind, sing-a-song like Happy Birthday, while washing your hands. This will be the amount of time needed to wash your hands thoroughly. Hand sanitizer will help too but beware of applying sanitizer with alcohol on kids for they might swallow the dangerous sum of alcohol.

2) Sneeze into your elbow. If you cannot stop a cough or a sneeze from escaping your mouth, then give it the elbow. Sneezing into the bend of your arm will catch gems that normally your hand would get while covering your mouth and nose. Sneezing into your hands, sets others up to catch bad gems already invading your body. When you touch doorknobs or shake hands with someone you are giving more than an act of kindness. Please think of the young and innocent ones, especially babies.

3) Do not touch your eyes, nose and mouth. These are entry points for viruses. When you are tired try not to lift your glasses and rub your eyes, don't rub the palm of your hand up your nose if you get the sniffles, and don't chew on your fingernails because this information makes you nervous! Doing so are sure ways to let in the virus! Remember touching others like hugging and shaking hands will spread the wealth of germs to others. This is hard for young babies as they love to rub their eyes and suck their little hands. If anyone of you know how to prevent this happen on young babies, please let me know. (10Q !)

4) Take daily vitamins. By taking a multi-vitamin and extra vitamin c once a day you will increase your body's ability to fight off bad germs. (Is this true? Anyone please confirm this with fact, thx again).

5) Do not go to a hospital for treatment for non-emergency injury and illnesses. The best place to catch a gem is in a hospital with many sick people and possibly carriers of the H1N1 Virus (Swine Flu). If you can wait to see your family doctor then do so.

6) Avoid travelling by plane until the flu is under control and a vaccine created. Being confined in closed quarters is the perfect way to spread a virus. Do not travel to Mexico unless it is necessary; it is probably best not go to there at all. Airlines are allowing people to change their flights without charge to avoid trips to Mexico. (I wonder why only Mexico, what about others?)

7) Wear a facemask to protect yourself and especially those who have health problems that low immune systems. There is no evidence the mask help, but they are a precaution to help prevent the spread of germs. If you live in an area that has suspected cases of H1N1 virus (swine flu) then wear a mask in public at work, on all public transportation and air travel. The CDC has recommended N95 respirator mask. They can be purchased in stores or online. (Is there any mask for young babies???)

8) Spray Lysol in your house and your car. Spray on doorknobs, toilet seats and handles; pretty much and place of that a human touches. Do this several times a day and allow spray to stay a full minute in order to disinfect. (Can I spray it onto airplane seat? Would they mind??)

Lastly, to identify the symtoms of H1N1:
- Fever
- Cough
- Sore throat
- Body aches
- Headaches
- Chills and fatigue
- Diarrhea and vomiting (sometimes)

Tips & Warnings:
1) Swine flu is a real health issue but one that can be better controlled with correct information and prevention strategies.
2) Review and re-view your prevention interventions listed in this article and make sure each member of your family or community understands them (that is why I decided to post it here).
3) Information and treatment are expected to change due to the advances in our enhanced ability to learn about swine flu and to communicate more effectively worldwide via the Internet.

(Source: http://www.ehow.com)

Happy Mother's Day 2009

2009-05-05T13:51:00.000+08:00

the melody inside my heart, the unfinished song
do you realize the missing beat?

the recent world is a bit odd, is like the missing pieces
that music of my heart is such an indescribable feeling

do you feel touch while you are listening to it
me myself do not know how nice it sounds indeed

this endless incomplete melody
sounds so real inside me, it makes me wanna sing

now, I wanted to complete this melody
though others may thought that I am crazy

“mama… mama u know I love u
and loving u is like the food to my soul”

- p/s: this message is posted to my other blog page too -

Porridge first or Cereals?

2009-05-04T11:38:00.002+08:00

Time really flies, Cayenne grows older and wiser each day. She is now smiles more to us which makes everyone so happy to meet her.

Went to visit Calvin's aunt in Puchong yesterday, she advise us not to feed Cayenne sweetened food like cereals first as this might makes her not willing to take "salty" food like porridge later. She experienced this from Ian boy.

What the experts have to say about this? Please insert your "two-cents" here!!

Thank you (^_^)

Breastfeeding

2009-04-17T14:36:00.005+08:00

Awww... it is so sad to see the little one coughing and having sleepless nights.

Phlegm and nose blocked are annoying Cayenne especially after feeding. She cough so badly each time right immediate after milk which later cause to vomit. This is so heart sickening to me and I blame myself for this. Brought her to the clinic for some medicine and the doctor said I shall breastfeed her to minimize all these sickness as she will get more antibodies from breast milk.

Now only I see more the importance of breast milk. I did but is only during confinement month.

Pains in me after my c-section when I could not even lie straight on my back to sleep. I tried to breastfeed her directly but it was hurt when she lies on my tummy. Then I switch over to use breast pump. Seeing her poo-poo so much every time during feeding which lead to lesser sleep is worrying me but never did I know this will eventually gone as she grows older. How I wish I knew all these before giving birth.

I shall breastfeed but now is too late. Luckily I have know a very good experienced doctor.

Cayenne says "Do you hear me?"

2009-03-11T13:14:00.008+08:00

Very often old folks especially my mom and mother-in-law told me not to carry my baby too often as this will "spoilt" them (they will ask for more). Somehow I wonder...

Young babies or infants are just normal human like us or anyone else, do you agree?. Won't they feel bored too after too long being left alone there without any entertainment or without anyone to talk to? On the other hand, is it true that they will be "spoilt" if we respond to them each time they cried for attention?

Too much of carrying your baby is another big No No to old folks. Why? Of course I am not talking about carrying him or her all around the clock but every time my mom-in-law saw me carrying my baby she will warn me. Why? Why?? You think that I am too free? Don't we suppose to let the baby "burb" each time after feeding? Aren't we suppose to comfort them when they cries for sleep or caress? Hmm??

How true are all these old folk's tales? and so... Cayenne says "Do you hear me? I'm talking to you across the water across the deep blue ocean" *LOL*.

Too Many Helping Hands

2009-02-06T17:08:00.023+08:00

Phew! Finally I had successfully and safely gave birth to my little princess, Cayenne. Though the time in hospital was very scary but I feel relieved once I was allow to go home on the 6th day.

My loving sister offers me her place for confinement she even had prepared the room for me and my baby. Although I prefer to stay at mom's place but due to her kindness and offering I did not turn her down, so I moved in immediately after discharged from the hospital.

The first night was very exciting for all of them, sis and niece wanted to sleep with me and baby, but it was very exhausted for me. After having long hours and sleepless nights at the hospital I wish I could have a peace sleep at that moment but I could not reject them to share the room. Somehow I failed to lie down and snore straight away as my pain from the C-Section is over powering me. Cries alot!

Feelings got worst when sis wanted to move my baby over to her room when she claims that I would have sleep better without the baby beside me. Why can't she understand being a new mother, I wanted to be close with my baby. I don't deny my sis is trying to help me but somehow her procedures in taking care of my baby are not the way I prefer. Am I too stubborn or too fussy here? But it is just me!

Nightmare begun when mom has to return to work after CNY break on the 6th days which is also my 2nd day of total-sleep (all the while I sat on a long chair to sleep), sis threw everything back to me. She wanted me to learn on how to take care of my baby all by myself that night but doesn't she understand that I do need another night or two to recover before I could be independent again?

Wanted to speak to somebody but they all thought that I am crazy even the Indonesian maid made crazy stories about me. I cried again! Anyhow, my sister's behaviour is worrying me when the pacifier she stuffed into my baby's mouth is against Calvin's order. Then I knew she increased the milk volume for my baby in a sudden. Now my baby does not eat at a fix volume, she sometimes need 3.5oz and sometimes only 1.5oz is more than enough for her. Night times are the worst time to feed her as she doesn't demand on a fix volume. Spoken to mom, she blamed me that I am too pamper of my baby and I shall not rock her when she cries... haiz! Now I wanted to cry... again? Yeah! I cried for few nights at sis' place then I decided to move to mom's place and turn over a new leaf of motherhood.

Though now feeding baby at nights is a tough job but I wish I could monitor it and maintain her feed demand with a fix volume and fix time. That is why sometimes too many helping hands do not really mean a good thing.

My comment to others, plan it out the help you need during your confinement. A good helping hand is more than enough than thousands of inconsistent mindset.

Bad Heartburn Lately

2008-12-17T10:51:00.003+08:00

I am suffering from bad heartburn since last two weeks and it get worst only last Saturday until I can't fall asleep until 3a.m. Have been struggling for remedies to cure it naturally (without any chemical intake) but in the end I just doze off due to too tiredness.

I read from few websites about pregnancy and free online remedies but I did not try all of them as some are too complicated for D-I-Y. Now I am in the 8mth-pregnancy stage and patiently waiting to complete it.

If you have any best (chemical-free) remedies for heart-burn, kindly update me.

Thanks a bunch (^_^)

Pelvic Floor Exercise

2008-12-10T14:10:00.001+08:00

How to do Kegel exercises

It takes diligence to identify your pelvic floor muscles and learn how to contract and relax them. Here are some pointers:

Find the right muscles
To make sure you know how to contract your pelvic floor muscles, try to stop the flow of urine while you're going to the bathroom. If you succeed, you've got the basic move. Or try another technique: Insert a finger inside your vagina and try to squeeze the surrounding muscles. You should be able to feel your vagina tighten and your pelvic floor move upward. Then relax your muscles and feel your pelvic floor move down to the starting position. As your muscles become stronger — and you become more experienced with the exercises — this movement will be more pronounced.

But don't make a habit of starting and stopping your urine stream. Doing Kegel exercises with a full bladder or while emptying your bladder can actually weaken the muscles. It can also lead to incomplete emptying of the bladder, which increases your risk of a urinary tract infection.

If you're having trouble finding the right muscles, don't be embarrassed to ask for help. Your doctor or other health care provider can give you important feedback so that you learn to isolate and exercise the correct muscles.

Perfect your technique
Once you've identified your pelvic floor muscles, empty your bladder and sit or lie down. Then:

* Contract your pelvic floor muscles.
* Hold the contraction for three seconds then relax for three seconds.
* Repeat 10 times.
* Once you've perfected three-second muscle contractions, try it for four seconds at a time, alternating muscle contractions with a four-second rest period.
* Work up to keeping the muscles contracted for 10 seconds at a time, relaxing for 10 seconds between contractions.

To get the maximum benefit, focus on tightening only your pelvic floor muscles or isolating your pelvic floor muscles. Be careful not to flex the muscles in your abdomen, thighs or buttocks. Also, try not to hold your breath. Just relax, breathe freely and focus on tightening the muscles around your vagina and rectum.

Repeat three times a day
Perform a set of 10 Kegel exercises three times a day. The exercises will get easier the more often you do them. You might make a practice of fitting in a set every time you do a routine task, such as checking e-mail or commuting to work.

Vary your technique with one of these methods:

* Try sets of mini-Kegels. Count quickly to 10 or 20, contracting and relaxing your pelvic floor muscles each time you say a number.
* Visualize an elevator. Slow down the exercises, gradually contracting and releasing your pelvic floor muscles one at a time. As you contract, visualize an elevator traveling up four floors. At each floor, contract your muscles a little more until you reach maximum contraction at the fourth floor. Hold the contraction and then slowly release the tension as you visualize the elevator returning to the ground floor. Repeat 10 times.

Biofeedback training

If you have trouble doing Kegel exercises, biofeedback training may help. In a biofeedback session, a nurse, therapist or technician will either insert a small monitoring probe into your vagina or place adhesive electrodes on the skin outside your vagina or rectal area. When you contract your pelvic floor muscles, you'll see a measurement on a monitor that lets you know whether you've successfully contracted the right muscles. You'll also be able to see how long you hold the contraction.

Another technique uses electrical stimulation to help you feel the muscles contract. The procedure is painless, although you'll experience a buzzing feeling as a small electrical current is applied to your pelvic floor muscles, making them contract. Once you feel this sensation a few times, you'll probably be able to duplicate the exercise on your own. Because simpler methods work for most women, this technique is rarely used.
When to expect results

If you do your Kegel exercises faithfully, you can expect to see some results, such as less frequent urine leakage, within about eight to 12 weeks. Your improvement may be dramatic — or, at the very least, you may keep your problems from worsening. As with other forms of physical activity, you need to make Kegel exercises a lifelong practice to reap lifelong rewards.

(Source: http://www.mayoclinic.com)

Tips for Sleepless Nites

2008-12-10T11:13:00.001+08:00

Here are some tips to help you cope with sleeping problems during pregnancy:

• Surround yourself with pillows; everyday pillows or oversized ones

• Keep your room temperature at comfortable level. If you are too warm you will find it difficult to relax and sleep

• Sleep on your side with your legs and knees bent. Tuck a pillow under your abdomen and another one between your knees. Tuck one underneath your hip to remove the pressure off your hip

• Don't exercise too close to bedtime as it may actually keep your awake

• Don't eat heavy meal within 2-3 hours of going to bed as this will cause your metabolism to go into overdrive

• Skip the midnight snack if heartburn and indigestion are causing you grief

• Stretch your calves to prevent middle of the night cramps

• Drink a cup of warm milk

• Have a warm bath

• Practice relaxation breathing in bed

• Go do something else rather than tossing and turning in bed. Hit the sack once again when you start to feel tired.

Boy or Girl...

2008-11-15T12:46:00.008+08:00

Is this really a matter?

Typical Chinese-in-laws would always wanted to have a grandson as the first one but do they know that it is beyond our control somehow. It is cracking my head now as my baby is mature enough for me to find out the gender. Why should I putting so much unnecessary pressure to myself and my baby? *LOL*

I am somewhat not brave enough to know, indeed it does not really a matter for me to find out the gender at all. I am more concern about the health.

At this time being I just prepare clothings and baby accessories that's for unisex, and Calvin and I have few boy names and few names for girl as well. So I think we both are prepared for the new comer and that should be fine for him and I.

Do you foreseen any problem if it is a girl and not a boy? Arghh... what so big deal, huh? *LMAO*

Calcium During Pregnancy

2008-11-15T12:43:00.002+08:00

The recent milk powder / dairy product dilemmas really frighten me. I have been avoiding milk since then but I am very worry about my pregnancy without calcium intake. *big sigh*

Why at this time?

Looking for alternative to replace milk for calcium. Any better suggestion from you to me? I am not so much worry about myself but my baby. Do not really know what will happen to him/her if I have not enough calcium intake during pregnancy. :'(

Never to a Stranger!!

2008-09-18T11:27:00.006+08:00

Parents used to remind their kids not to talk to stranger, however today in this so insecure / dangerous country (like Malaysia), we ought to tell those kids not to even listen to stranger. I have stories to share here about listening to a stranger at shopping mall in Kuala Lumpur.

1) This girl is being stopped by two youngsters about 20. They are both asking for direction in Suria KLCC for about few minutes. The victim did not realize what actually had happened until she 'awake' after half an hour time. She found that she had actually lost her mobile phone and her gold necklace.

2) A girl is waiting for her friend on a busy road nearby a bus station. Suddenly a man came by and talk to her (asking for direction and such). This man make lotza body language (with his hands moving around here and there) while talking to the girl and as usual we always look up at the other party while talking to them. Within minutes, the girl was completely hypnotized by that man. She follows the man and as they were walking down the street her friend saw her passing by just right in front of her. As she does not respond her friend when she smile at her, her friend sense something is not right. Immediately she pick up her mobile phone and start calling her. That girl is "awake" when her phone rang and her friend had saved her day.

3) Another girl, doing her shopping at Mid Valley Mega Mall. While she was walking towards Coffee Bean, an Indian man stopped her and chat for about a minute with her. He was just complimenting her appearance and life (which is totally does not makes sense). This girl smell a strong fragrant from the man body which give her a signal that something is not right. She quickly turn away and ignore that man and went straight to Coffee Bean. As she was sitting at a table, she felt very dizzy for about 1/2 an hour. She believes the smell of the man's body is the "weapon" he used to hypnotize her. She's lucky!

But, how many lucky stars that we have with us? And are those stars be with us always? Do not just depends on luck, we have to be educated and be smart too. I still remember my teacher once told me "it is only 10% of luck and 90% of preparation for success".

This message should be forwarded and made known to all children and also old parents. For these "con men / women" are not aiming only on kids, they "attack" old and especially non-educated old citizens.

*With Love & Care*

Naming Your Baby

2008-09-04T11:52:00.014+08:00

This task sounds a little difficult to some people, especially to multilingual parents. The Chinese says "it is not that worst to have a bad life than bearing an unlucky name".

Naming our babies indeed is part of parenting which is more likely should be done by babies' parents. However, many times (especially Chinese) babies name is given by their grandparents and somehow sometimes they pay to some Master to do it. Why? Just to make sure their baby is bearing a lucky name which will leads them to a good life later (emmm... are you sure?). Well, it depends on how superstitious you are.

Besides unlucky name, we ought to put aside funny names too. At first Calvin and I wanted to name our baby girl Dorothy but it sounds like "tow lock tay" in Cantonese which means "drag to the floor" (see?). Then I thought to name her Deborah however again it sounds funny when you pronounce it with Cantonese slang "deck ball lie" which means "super boob" (omg!). *LMAO* What a joke?

I came across a few English names which sound weird, unlucky or funny when you call them with others slang; like:-

- Susan (in Cantonese... 'sway sun' = bad saint).
- Richard (in Cantonese... 'look chart' = d*ck).
- Peter (in Hokkien... 'pee tiao' = lie down).
- Elizabeth (in Cantonese... 'eee lay see fart' = examining your a**).
- Marcus (in Malay... 'markas' = headquaters);

and not least,

- Ben (in Hokkien... 'beng' = someone who speaks local slang mixed with English and Malay such as Manglish or Singlish and is often stereotypically portrayed to be anti-intellectual, superficial and materialistic and shallow).

In fact, all the above so called weird / unlucky / funny names are "inverted" by Beng. *LOL*

*fainted*

High BP during Pregnancy

2008-08-05T09:10:00.007+08:00

I was shocked when my doctor (normal GP) told me that I should not have such BP (blood pressure) reading during pregnancy, 130/90. Somehow he told me mine is not at alarming stage but have to monitor closely.

A normal BP reading is 120(systolic)/80(diastolic) and for pregnant lady her BP should be lower than this (due to hormone change). There are 4 types of hypertension occur in pregnancy which are Preeclampsia, Gestational Hypertension, Chronic Hypertension and Chronic Hypertension with Preeclampsia. To know more about this, click here (http://www.marchofdimes.com/professionals/14332_1222.asp)

Myself is a quite sensitive person, I do take every single words people comment about me and sometimes seriously and sometimes not so seriously *LOL*. However, I guess I am a little bit more worry than I should for this 130/90 reading. It is actually not an alarming stage which is so serious. My sis says she also encountered this during her last pregnancy and it is actually a normal thing.

My advice to myself and you (especially a first-time mother) is "Do not be too worry until the alarm bell rings" *hehehe* just sit back and relax. The following are 2 websites I found about:

- How to manage high BP during pregnancy? >> http://www.doctorndtv.com/FAQ/detailfaq.asp?id=3246

- High Blood Pressure in Pregnancy >> http://www.nhlbi.nih.gov/health/public/heart/hbp/hbp_preg.htm

No Oranges During Pregnancy?

2008-07-31T16:09:00.003+08:00

Guess what? My first lesson during my early pregnancy is "do not eat so many oranges" from my mother-in-law.

I was about to cry-out-loud when she warns me so and I could not say much as she's "mother". According to her, and she got that from her friend, eating too many oranges will make my baby turns "orange" or "yellow" when born. Huh?? *fainted*

What a great joke as our starter of this blogging? *LOL* However, the only thing sound reasonable about eating oranges during pregnancy I heard from Carol Hoh is it will cause phlegm in the newborn. The best advice is still "do not eat anything extremely much though they are well-known to be good for health".

Cheers all and don't forget to write your comment ya?

I'm 3mths pregnant now! *hehehe*